Whirlpool of Emotions

I'm feeling a little sense of disappointment, a little sadness, a little frustration and a little helpless at this moment. It is very difficult for me to really understand what I am feeling right now and even more difficult to understand why. I'm just feeling a whirlpool of negative feelings twirling in my gut right now. And its all because of something that I've discovered.

I found out a certain something about a certain someone whom I considered a very close friend. Its not that I don't believe in keeping secrets, in fact, I think everyone has their own entitlement to a fair share of them, even between couples. What I am not happy about is when they would not admit to it when discovered.

Its not something that is actually a very big issue , which is why I feel that it is kind of sad that you cannot tell me. Are you afraid that I will look at you differently? Think differently about you? Or are you just too ashamed?

Then again, I think my feelings are just a bit overblown now, I have rationalized it all but my emotions are still nagging me about it. I know that I have grown to be a more FEELING person than I was. Not that I'm not a THINKING person anymore, on the contrary, sometimes I even think too much about my feelings. Its just that now, my feelings are more powerful than they used to be last time. So much so that the thinking won't help to much to ease the feeling.

So I guess, I will still be feeling lousy for a while. You know something, you can come to me. I might nag you a bit, but I won't judge you. But then again, you might not even read this.